how to be aware in an unaware world

Author: Josh Avery

Choices
“Our greatest freedom is the freedom to choose our attitude.”
– Victor Frankl
We have as much reason to choose positivity as we do negativity, but the latter is quite illogical in my opinion.
A negative mood reinforces a negative attitude, and let’s be honest, nobody likes a negative attitude.
This is not the same as sadness, frustration, or even anger, which are healthy to express in their own right moment.
Reflection
Negativity breeds judgment and facilitates grudges. I for one would rather choose positivity, even when it seems there is little reason to.
Why? Because my attitude is everything. What I see in the mirror reflects how I treat others and the truth is I love myself.
I also hold myself to high standards, to be hopeful, kind, and positive. It begins with affirmations. Just like how we are what we eat, we are also what we tell ourselves.
How a single choice can lead to the most profound change in our lives fascinates me every day.
For example, the choice to brush our teeth (which is a wonderful habit to link to meditation) gives us fresh breath, clean teeth, and even extends our lifespan.
When we remember to meditate before or after brushing our teeth, then we can attach one great habit to another (all meditation is not the same either, if it is difficult to sit for a while, try going on a walk or use guided meditation!)
Although a choice is difficult to describe, like putting one foot in front of the other vs buying a new car, the average adult makes around 35,000 decisions daily.
That’s a hell of a lot of decisions, and when faced with too many options, our brains naturally overload, struggling to process all available information, leading first to decision fatigue and then to decision paralysis.
(Decision Fatigue refers to the idea that our ability to make good decisions becomes depleted over time).
(Decision Paralysis is where we cannot make a choice, even when all necessary information is available).
Our constant availability of technology and bombardment of notifications has only increased in the last decade, making the practice of pausing to literally catch our breath or go on a nice walk without our phones or music has become a necessity.
The simplest choice is to put our devices in another room, outside the reach before bed, and when waking up, can affect our entire night (restful sleep) and morning (undistracted mornings).
The easiest solution I’ve found is a Fitbit Watch to remind me when it’s time to settle down, wake me up with a smart alarm, and track me while I dream of an endless world full of adventure and misfits (no this is not an advertisement, for that look at the link at the bottom lol).
Encouragement
No matter what, be kind. First to yourself and then to others. Repeat affirmations in the third person like: “You have the ability to do anything you put your mind towards.” or “Your happiness is a choice.”
Whether you believe these to be true or not doesn’t matter. Kindness towards yourself is a choice that has tremendous power.
Thanks
Thank you so much for the affirmation and encouragement lately ya’ll, it pushes me to keep this train going!
Feel free to leave a comment or share this post. You can also Buy Me a Coffee if you are inclined to do so. Thank you in advance!
Links
November 15, 2023
Worry
“I skate to where the puck is going to be, not to where it has been.”
– Wayne Gretzky
I found this quote in an investing and trading ebook. It was used in reference to a long-term approach in the stock market. The author’s guidance was to invest where the market will be, not where it has been.
It is also an equally great metaphor for life. The past is behind us, unable to be modified or relived, but the future is where possibility and opportunity lie.
(So I just realized this quote is much more about regret than worry, but I got carried away and reflected on worry instead, so I’ll post about regret next).
Reflection
Granted, the past provides much that can help us in the present (if we are aware of those past mistakes and learning opportunities).
Then there is the greatly significant difference between planning for the future and worrying about the future.
Worry may disguise itself as planning, but it couldn’t be any different.
Planning brings you back to the present after completion. Worrying leaves you in the future, contemplating endless possibilities.
Worry is an unfortunate side effect of the pursuit. Will it end up okay? Will I be successful? Will I be able to survive? Will they like me? And on and on.
It is actually a quite natural and albeit sometimes helpful emotion (when worried about a loved one, showing a deep connection and concern).
But I would argue that the majority of worry (like 90%) is really unhelpful and even destructive.
This is where mindfulness steps in and teaches us to step back from all kinds of thinking (worry or otherwise) and simply observe the present mind.
It takes a lot of practice (day after day for months) to truly realize the power of mindfulness throughout the day.
Meditation is not a practice with a completion, it is a transformation for a lifetime.
How does mindfulness help with worry in our ever-changing lives? I’m so glad you asked!
Worry enters the mind, say the worry about whether you will get a job or not in preparation for an interview, and you begin to spend a considerable amount of time thinking about that job.
Now, some of that worry is constructive (like the 10% when noticing the worry itself meaning you care a lot about the job and should take it seriously).
And the rest of that worry can be let go of: “Oh yeah, I’m worrying right now about this job way too much and I choose to let that worry go and move on to what I’m doing right now.”
Like I said, this sounds so easy on paper, but without devoted practice to noticing thought (worry) and letting it go, we cannot achieve this effect so easily, we will succumb to the thinking (worrying) and add a lot of unnecessary stress to our lives.
Encouragement
I encourage us to find the worries throughout the day today and simply begin to note them (in a tiny, cute notepad or on our bubbly, colorful notes app).
Literally. Jot down someplace all that worries you right now in your life, and again when you begin to worry in the future.
And when planning our complicated lives, look to the past for guidance, look to the present when we’ve got caught chasing the past or future, and look at the future for possibility and hope!
Thanks
Thank you again for worrying about me (lol just kidding, there is no need to worry about me!) But, thank you for your attention reading this post, it is a rare gift these days.
As always, feel free to leave a comment or share this post, let me know if you enjoy the posts. You can also Buy Me a Coffee if you are inclined to do so. Thank you in advance!
Links
November 9, 2023
Faith
Faith is like a tree. It stands tall and weathers the storm because it is firmly grounded. Its roots reach deep and wide, its base thick and solid. It grows stronger as time passes and it reaches up, receiving warmth with open arms.
This was a little bit I came up with a while ago when living in Nashville. It was a beautiful afternoon and I was in a particularly reflective mood.
As I walked around the small apartment complex where I lived, I noticed a tree I so often overlooked, standing, beaming in the sunlight just outside the apartment and I went to sit there beneath it, witnessing this analogy to faith.
Reflection
A few years back, I did a purge of almost all my posts, pictures, and videos on Facebook so that I could start fresh with the intention of sharing only the content I valued.
In the process, I found reflections of my early faith in Christianity, for I grew up in a Christian household and was influenced greatly by the religion.
When I was younger, I had a naive sense of faith. Like a child, I was more willing to believe in something I didn’t fully understand. But somewhere in the naiveté, a feeling emerged. A feeling that surpasses all comprehension.
In essence, that is what faith is—an incomprehensible feeling.
Even now, I grasp that feeling from time to time, like a tree, feeling forces outside my understanding and comprehension supporting me.
I learned to question my faith and even the faith of my parents and those around me.
I found through that questioning that what I feel is what truly matters, and mindfulness gives me the awareness to recognize what I feel more and more.
I found that I aligned most with the core beliefs and philosophy of Buddhism, but also held on to the values instilled in a Christian household.
Mindfulness meditation and journaling instilled in me a compass that guides me when I am confused or unsteady and community-based fellowship and prayer instilled in me the faith needed to face any challenge this world throws at me.
I had to discover for myself that I do feel a sense of peace and contentment in believing I was created, that I was beautifully and wonderfully made.
Creator, Higher-Power, Yahweh, Father, whatever incredibly simple term we use to describe such a feeling as God, faith is the pillar to reaching it.
Faith requires a complete and utter surrender of self. It is letting go of logic and reason like meditation is letting go of thought and sensation.
Faith exists in the present too, I cannot be faithful towards a higher power or even another person in the past or the future, only here and now.
Encouragement
I encourage us to really question our beliefs, our perspective of faith, and what it means to us.
Ask yourself specifically what you believe or even if you believe in anything. It’s completely okay if you don’t know, this is simply a healthy thought experiment.
Write down those beliefs you hold firmly, those you would like to change, and those you would not support at all.
Thanks
Thank you deeply for your attention in reading this post, it is a rare gift these days.
As always, feel free to leave a comment or share this post, let me know if you enjoy the posts. You can also Buy Me a Coffee if you are inclined to do so. Thank you in advance!
Links
November 4, 2023