Mindfulness &

how to be aware in an unaware world

Author: Josh Avery

  • Control

    Control

    Changing things up a bit, this post is much less a how-to-live-better and much more a small story of a small hike I went on earlier this year. Also, If you find any value in my musings, your support will go miles long to support me! You can do so over at buymeacoffee.com/mindfulnessand

    “We treat the body cruelly to remind it that the mind is in control.”

    A beautiful and eloquent quote I cannot find the source of (or cited source of). It reminds me of every time I’ve pushed past my body and mind’s limits, from hiking Olamana’s Three Peaks in sandals and half a water bottle, or Kings Peak after springing both ankles a few months prior, or climbing Queens Bluff when my arms and legs shook uncontrollably from the danger, or camping alone and banged up in the deep woods of northern Alabama. Each time, my mind was in control even though my body was strained. I focused and re-focused on what steps ensured survival. The mind has a ridiculous amount of power over the body, we are reminded of this every 4 years during the Olympics or on any given outdoor channel. So if I could give any encouragement in this post it would be to never forget the power of your mind. Train it to your betterment, and use it to your advantage.

    It is early January as I hike up and up along the steep and dry face of Mt. Olympus in Salt Lake’s mountainous backyard, pushing higher and higher above the inversion, I turn around to see…

    Bated breath escapes my lungs as I stand and soak in the appalling and mesmerizing view, a flat lake of dense pollution and cold, trapped air floating above Salt Lake Valley.

    I can hear the momentous traffic below, a steady hum like an AC running in the background of a summer home. It is loud enough to drown out the thoughts bubbling in the mind yet soft enough to drown out the exhaustion in the body.

    Leaving the hum behind, I continue up the rocky trail, around the corner of the canyon, the sun inching out of a thing cloud above. Turning left into a dark caress of the canyon covered by trees on either side, I reach a section of the trail covered with packed snow and pause to catch my breath again.

    A few fellow enthusiasts greet me while sliding down with crampons and much more sense than I. A mental note is taken to get some crampons or spikes when I next see fit to.

    While continuing up the trail into steeper ground and fewer trees, I begin to realize the sun is getting cautiously low, hovering just above the mountains in the distance, and I get cautiously close to turning around, without the proper gear and light to push my will much further. How to Trick Your Brain into Doing Hard Things

    Though this is an interesting reflection, my will was waning, but my body was content with going further. Previously, logic would have lost to determination, yet as I age so does my determination, becoming less childlike and more deliberate. How to Train Your Brain to Enjoy Doing Hard Things

    And so, it doesn’t take long for my logical voice to win as I pause to take a sip of water, sit down on the blanketed trail, and then cautiously begin my descent back down, darkness slowly closing in…

    And here is another question. What about darkness besides the lack of light is to be feared and cautious of? Sure, there are lower temperatures and night-time creatures to not forget, however, the cold is tempered by warmer clothing and a quicker pace, and to the hidden creatures, we are just another strange predator, but unequivocally not preferred prey.

    Thank you for reading this story of mine and the associated, random thinking. Given that hard things only become harder when we recognize them as being “hard” in the first place, I will make writing an easy task. How to Trick Your Brain to Like Doing Hard Things

    In reality, when I just sit to write, I enjoy it very, very much and it’s not laborious at all, the trick is to just sit to write. Have a wonderful day!

  • Criticism

    Criticism

    I’ve changed the structure and format of these posts to be more engaging and precise about what the post is about, hope you’ll enjoy this one! If you do find value in my musings, you can Buy Me a Coffee over at buymeacoffee.com/mindfulnessand Thank you in advance!

    “If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear.”
    – George Orwell

    This is such a potent quote today, where we are very divided in this country and that division has created callousness towards differing opinions. Orwell is so right to say that the price of liberty is freedom of not only speech but also attention.

    True attention holds no reserve judgment or criticism, it involves listening without the two, and even without a response.

    I believe Orwell is also not saying that liberty means we should reserve our truest thoughts and opinions for those who will listen either but rather mindfully express those two openly and kindly.

    If we were to only speak what comforts the ears of others, and only listen to what comforts our own, we would live in a fantasy, a utopia that is far from reality.

    The reality is, that everyone has an opinion, some much more fixed to theirs than others, and instead of avoiding those that we don’t sit well with or fighting back at them, we can have an open mind and just listen. How to Handle Receiving Constructive Criticism

    There are small, subtle, impactful ways we can listen to criticism, and in a way, strengthen a mental muscle akin to willpower (the strength to just shut up and listen).

    1. Remember there’s a benefit to receiving criticism:
      What benefits you might be asking? Well, criticism helps us improve our listening skills, patience, and relationships as well as helping us find any truth in what the other person is saying.
    2. Curtail any reaction you’re having to the criticism:
      We are reactionary creatures it’s true, which is why this takes a good bit of mindfulness. Although it can be challenging to receive criticism from a co-worker, friend, family member, or even someone that you don’t fully respect, just remember that the most accurate and constructive feedback often comes from ‘flawed’ sources.
    3. There is a deep understanding of listening to criticism:
      When receiving feedback, cultivate a mindful presence. Engage in active listening, providing a space for the individual to express their thoughts fully and uninterrupted. Once they’ve shared, reflect on their words to them, seeking clarity, such as, “It sounds like you’re suggesting I use a kinder tone, is that accurate?” Refrain from analyzing or challenging their assessment; instead, center your focus on comprehending their viewpoint. Extend understanding by giving the benefit of the doubt, and acknowledging the challenge of delivering feedback. Please recognize that the person offering feedback may feel uneasy or might not articulate their thoughts perfectly.

    If this were the mode of operation and standard of thought for that which causes division in the world today, there would be little to no division at all.

    Yeah, sometimes what other people have to say sucks and sometimes it’s uncomfortable, but their opinion can open your eyes and face things you might otherwise ignore. How to Handle Criticism Like a Pro

    The right to speak openly and even critically is fundamental, no matter how unpleasant it sounds to the status quo. Without this ability, we have no liberty. Have a wonderful day yall!

  • Less

    Less

    I’ve been working on these Gratitude Manifestations, one of which was the gratitude for a job I greatly enjoy and challenges me, and well, it has come to fruition and filled my plate with a ton of work. I have now found the pace to get back into writing, and will continue to do so each day! If you enjoy my posts and would like to, you can support me over at buymeacoffee.com/mindfulnessand

    “The best things in life aren’t things.“

    This one isn’t so much a quote as it is a simple yet profound statement passed on for thousands of years. For the past few months I have begun to repeat this phrase in my day, and by way of repetition, also understand its meaning more and more.

    The Best Things in Life Aren’t Things

    I have found, over and over, that the purpose of life, at least as mine is concerned, includes people. The relationships and experiences spent with the ones I love, admire, and get to know, have strengthened this revelation.

    Additionally, living with less has taught me to appreciate more. More time, more energy, more ideas, more travel, and more opportunities.

    It’s when I break down the idea of possession that I find this truth: I don’t own a single thing (the posture of Stoicism).

    Stoicism: You Don’t Own Anything.

    Yes, you hear that right.  Everything I had, have, and will ever have is borrowed. My car and everything in it is borrowed from resources of the Earth, from the air I breathe to the body I inhabit is borrowed for a few years and then returned to the Earth.

    The Philosophy of Stoicism

    We are but animated shells on this ride called life, and it’s this realization that helps me put it all in perspective and feel so grateful for these gifts. For this shared, human experience.

    But why then do we hold ever so tightly onto the things (tangible and intangible) as if they will remain in our lives forever?

    Because of a little unknown word called enculturation, which teaches us to desire and strive for the things and people we want so we can experience and “have” them for ourselves.

    We are indoctrinated at a young age to think and act with enculturation, and it takes constant practice and mindfulness as an adult not to give in to it, and even then we still do.

    This isn’t to say things don’t matter. Every post on this blog, this post, was typed on a laptop that I enjoy using, from a company that makes consumer goods I’m particularly attached to (I’ll let you guess which one).

    But I remind myself often that these are things for my usage alone, and therefore, I shouldn’t get particularly attached to them.

    Should I be robbed or lose these things, life will go on (quite literally). If we don’t remember to use things for their proper purposes, they can, over time, rob of us the truth that the best things in life aren’t things, but rather the people and experiences we have throughout our lives.

    So, you probably asking by now, Josh, what are the damn 6 ways to live with less?

    1. Take on the minimalism game – So every time I mention this challenge, people freak out and already give up. It’s not necessarily a challenge to become a minimalist, but rather minimize the clutter in your life! Just try it for a week at least!
    2. Keep a box or bag in your room or common area to put things in that no longer serve a purpose in your life.
    3. Go through your phone’s apps, photos, videos, and documents; deleting the things that you forgot were buried in there.
    4. Also go through your computer’s apps, photos, videos, and documents; and save the things you want or need to the cloud.
    5. This might sound counter-intuitive, but turn your phone (and computer) screens to monochrome, which will make your devices boring as shit, and you will be far less fixated on the stuff on them.
    6. When we stare at screens much less than we stare at our friend’s faces, we begin to live with less, less of all that is advertised on our screens!

    Consider today those closest to you. Spend time with them if you can, or just call them up and thank them for being in your life.