“Compassion has no limit and kindness has no enemy.”
What comes to mind when you think of a compassionate act?
What about a kind affirmation or encouragement?
When bestowed upon you, how do compassion and kindness feel?
Compassion and kindness are so similar that they often occupy the same space in the mind. A space that is essential to a healthy, happy life and needed every single day.
Though they may seem synonymous and are necessary all the same, there is a difference between the two.
Compassion is more about not wanting someone to suffer, not wanting someone to experience something negative and downtrodden.
Kindness is more about wishing that someone was well, hoping that someone does experience something positive and uplifting.
Equally, compassion and kindness must begin in ourselves, for ourselves.
Self-compassion is not wanting ourselves to feel unhappy, struggle, or have difficulty in our body, mind, and situations aka tender loving care (so we do the things that make this a reality).
Self-kindness is wishing ourselves well, telling ourselves that we are able, we are content, we are happy, and we are good aka affirmations (so we say the things that make this a reality).
Both are self-fulfilling prophecies (it sounds cliche, but it is resoundingly true).
If we wish to be more kind to others, we must speak kindly to ourselves.
If we wish to be more compassionate to others, we must show compassion to ourselves.
What we feed the mind is also key (equally cliche, but needed now more than ever).
When we feed the mind with sustaining and nourishing things, we speak with kindness, move with gentleness, encourage others, and overall feel amazed with ourselves.
On the other hand, when we feed the mind degrading and rotten things, we will speak with malice and spite, move with angst and anger, discourage others, and overall feel like shit about ourselves.
Despite what the world tells us on the internet and in the media, kindness is an innate quality that every human possesses.
We may lose sight of kindness or forget that we are born with it, but kindness is shown in every corner of the earth and every vessel of our hearts. The more we are aware of that fact, the more we can start to show kindness (beginning with ourselves).
The trouble is remembering that these qualities already exist in the mind and that we already have the desire to exhibit them.
For example, how do you feel when someone is truly kind to you?
Do you feel there is an inclination to do or say something kind back?
Affirmations at the start of our day, as a wake-up exercise, bring out this inclination more and more.
There are many incredible affirmations out there, but there are five affirmations that I have used for the past year or so, and I can truly say they have transformed my life:
You are capable (of anything you put your mind towards).
You are calm (using your breath as your anchor when stress arises).
You are clear (knowing where you are and where you’re going).
You are content (already having all you need to succeed).
You are compassionate (finding ways to speak your love languages).
Be sure to use the third person as if you’re talking to a dear friend (trust me, it works wonders).
And whether you believe these to be true or not doesn’t matter. What matters is that you simply say them, over and over every day.
Kindness towards yourself needs no reasoning.
Compassion towards others needs no justification.
A few more things:
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