Mindfulness &

how to be aware in an unaware world

Category: Quotes

  • Presence

    Presence

    Last June I went to one of the most incredible music festivals known by many in the electronic music scene, surrounded by the shade and beauty of Michagen’s pine and spruce trees: Electric Forest.

    A month before the festival, over fifty thousand other attendees and I received a welcome package: wristband, stickers, a sunglasses pouch, and a message printed on a card so eloquent, so needed, that it stopped me dead in my tracks.

    This message was from a voice that some artists at Electric Forest, like INZO and LSDream, use in their music to add an extra layer of meaning to the whole shebang. Alan Watts reminds us here, at a poignant time in history, to ditch distractions and remember the presence:

    “We are living in a culture entirely hypnotized by the illusion of time, in which the so-called present moment is felt as nothing but an infinitesimal hairline between an all-powerfully causative past and an absorbingly important future. We have no present. Our consciousness is almost completely preoccupied with memory and expectation. We do not realize that there never was, is, nor will be any other experience than the present experience. We are therefore out of touch with reality.”

    What I love most about this quote is the direct reminder that any time we overthink about the past or the future, we waste that time not living in the present.

    The present moment, as Alan describes, is the opposite of thinking in the past or the future, it is simply the direct, undiluted seconds passing by right now.

    Undiluted in a real-world context means not watching TV while eating dinner, not looking at your phone while holding a conversation, and yes, not dwelling on the past or planning for the future while preparing for bed.

    The undiluted presence will seem boring at first, but only because we are accustomed to filling every moment with something. In time, the presence of nothing will be a place of comfort and gratitude in itself. In a previous post, I wrote about the surprising benefits of doing nothing: Mindfulness & Nothing

    Do not confuse overthinking with constructive thinking either, because some thinking is good. Constructive thinking helps us learn from our mistakes, taste the sweetness of a good memory or bitterness of a bad one, plan for the future, prepare for rainy days, and feel the excitement of an experience yet to come.

    But Alan Watts is not saying that we shouldn’t plan for our future, he is saying not to live in our future. If “living” is defined as a present state of mind and in the present filled with overthinking about the future, then we are “living” as Alan describes, in a space hypnotized by the illusion of time.

    We are all naturally inclined to overthink the past or the future, I find myself planning a lot in the future, spending a considerable amount of time on Plan A, B, and sometimes C. This is constructive thinking in the beginning but then overflows into overplanning, a place much similar to reminiscing of “better” times in the past.

    The illusion of time includes these spaces: a future better than the present moment (when it sucks), and a past better than the present (when it sucks). There is no difference between the two spaces, only that they are not real.

    Only the present moment (especially when it sucks) is reality, and this space is constantly challenged by our overthinking minds.

    How do we live with presence and mindfulness? It takes a great deal of discipline at first, which then turns into a daily practice, which then turns into a state of flow.

    If you have the availability, take your shoes off and find a patch of Mother Earth to stand on before going through these simple grounding steps:

    Step 1: Close your eyes, cutting off your most distracting sense of vision.

    Step 2: Feel the subtle weight of gravity, grounding you not only to your feet on the ground but also to this moment.

    Step 3: Stay in this place of grounding for as long as you can. Feel the senses activate, hearing, feeling, smelling, tasting even.

    Step 4: When it feels right, lower the hands to the ground, bend the knees, and touch your forehead to the ground, thankful for the perfect amount of gravity, stable ground, and the ever presence of this moment in time.

    Thank you so much for joining me and my accompanying thoughts in this post on presence. If you find any value in my work and would like to support me, please share this post with your friends and family. You can also support me by buying me a coffee. Thanks so much in advance!

  • Fulfillment

    Fulfillment

    Having made poor attempts to release a new blog post here on Mindfulness & each week, I am going to simply do my best in writing each week and therefore release some of that writing here.

    This is an excerpt from The Story of Cogia (Sandman) by Hassan Alhabba (I believe I read it in the book Arabian Nights):

    “My wife was like one distracted when she knew what she had done. She cried, beat her breast, and tore her hair and clothes. Unhappy women that I am, cried she, where shall I find this sandman? I never saw him before. O husband, added she, you were much to blame in not telling the secret to me. 

    Wife, said I, moderate your grief; by your cries you will alarm the neighbors, and they will only laugh at, instead of putting us. We had best bear our loss patiently, and submit ourselves to the will of God.

    It is true we live poorly; but what have the rich which we have not? Do not we breathe the same air, enjoy the same light, and the same warmth of the sun? Why should we envy their happiness? They die as well as we. In short, while we live in the fear of God, their advantage over us is so inconsiderable that we ought not to covet it.”

    —

    This passage seems to begin with a lesson to women to be submissive to their husbands. This story was written long ago in an age when this was the norm. I do not agree with this position, where the wife makes the mistake of losing the sandman (the god of dreams). But given the time, the writer had little respect or concern for women’s independent feelings.

    Besides that internal note, what I gleaned from this passage was to live not to accumulate wealth or status (which is so hard not to follow), but to experience all that is possible.

    We live in such an overstimulated world today, where it takes much discipline to put the screens down and spend time with others or in nature. Our desire for more is not new, it is embedded in human nature, and it shows even in this passage written 600-900 BC.

    Every single person on this beautiful blue marble is connected by a shared human experience; love, loss, frustration, sadness, boredom, and even anxiety over finances are what connect us.

    Let go of the worries that beset you, no matter their root. As they arise, ask yourself, “Is this the place I belong right now?” And even if you answer like I do, “Well maybe, but not completely”, then devise a plan to find out where you belong, and then see that plan through.

    This is a plan that will change with the seasons, but one that you will know is right at your core. I know one of my paths in life is to write, to express myself through the medium of words. And I know this for two reasons.

    One is because I have been writing in a journal since I could remember. I have journals that date back to ten years old. Much similar to a pianist or guitarist that starts playing as a child.

    But the other reason was that when I stopped writing or got too busy in life, it felt like I was missing a piece of me, something I wasn’t doing causing this mystery emptiness. I wasn’t living a fulfilling life. I know that sounds crazy but it’s true. I believe every one of us has that something that we must do to fulfill us. It’s possible it can be more than one thing but no more than three.

    For instance, Robert Downey Jr, one of my favorite people I’ve yet to meet, is an actor, musician, and writer; it’s safe to say that all three fulfill him, but acting is that one thing he probably can’t do.

    Two other paths are to explore and to photograph (although photography is just attention to detail mixed with a creative mind). There is nothing spectacular about taking a photo, especially today, but there is something beautiful about telling a story from a photo.

    If done right, a collection of photos becomes a snapshot of the past to teach a powerful lesson about the future, which of course is the preset. I have created a website in an attempt to do just this: joshaveryphoto.com

    The other path was to explore, and boy does that fulfill me, the release of dopamine mixed with the craving of novelty is one reason why I love to travel so much. The other reason is that I cannot, physically, sit around too long without knowing what else is out there. I’d call this unfulfilling.

    Now, when I combine the three: writing, photography, and travel, I reach a place of completion, where I couldn’t be happier doing anything else (and I’ve attempted doing a lot of other things).

    The other much more important reason to travel, take photos, and write is to make a positive difference, even if it’s just to one other person.

    Now, what does all this have to do with letting go of that human desire to accumulate wealth or status? It is the reframing of that difficult endeavor to one of a question, “How can I pursue that which accumulates fulfillment and makes a difference to someone”.

    In both letting go of one thing and pursuing another, we move the needle closer to a place of true contentment. Wealth and status lose their attraction and fulfillment and difference takes their place.

  • Happiness

    Happiness

    As mentioned last post, I am kicking off a new post series on the most common human emotions: Happiness, Sadness, Anger, Fear, Surprise, Disgust, Love, Jealousy, Anxiety, and Excitement. I hope I can bring some insight and breakdown of probably the most sought-after quality in this life: Happiness.

    “Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.”

    – Mahatma Gandhi

    This description by Gandhi is one of many ways to think of happiness because in reality, happiness may have universal qualities we yearn for, but it is highly personal too. How about this take from Emerson:

    “For every minute you are angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness.”

    – Ralph Waldo Emerson

    Or this one from the great Roman Emperor:

    “The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts.”

    – Marcus Aurelius

    Happiness is a quality to look for not only in yourself, and that which makes you happy, but in those close to you.

    Very Well Mind defines happiness as such:

    Typically, happiness is an emotional state characterized by feelings of joy, satisfaction, contentment, and fulfillment. While happiness has many different definitions, it is often described as involving positive emotions and life satisfaction.

    The way I like to define happiness in my own experience here on this short yet exciting ride called life is less characterized by a set of things achieved or obtained, but rather a feeling developed through suffering:

    Happiness is the short yet sweet realization that the breath flowing in and out of your lungs is a gift of divine intervention.

    Without the (literally perfect) conditions of this planet, we wouldn’t have a “breath” to breathe, balanced at about 71% Nitrogen and 21% Oxygen, we live on a miracle spinning at roughly 1,000 mph and tilted at exactly 23.45 degrees on its axis.

    It’s absolutely incredible we are walking, talking, and doing anything really on this rare rock.

    All that was mentioned to strengthen the notion that we are experiencing a time and place in this universe at just the right moment. We are walking, talking, and breathing miracles.

    That realization, if nothing else comes of this life, is enough to be happy.

    Happiness is a choice. It blows my mind when I find that some of the happiest people on earth live with the least amount of luxuries, proving that all the niceties of life actually get in the way of a nice life.

    This doesn’t mean that creating a happy life is easy by any means, there are days in fact when it seems impossible, but that’s where mindfulness comes in.

    Being mindful of the smallest joys, the tiniest gains, and the crumbs of hope can release dopamine and serotonin in impactful ways. These two chemicals work together in miraculous ways to regulate our emotions and responses to different situations, contributing to our overall sense of happiness and well-being.

    Well then, what can I do to be happy you may ask?

    There is no straight answer and no right path to happiness because it’s highly personal. To me, happiness is people. Meeting new people, spending quality time with quality people, and flying halfway across the world to see people.

    But for a good friend of mine, it’s a sport, he absolutely loves teamwork and sportsmanship and getting involved in all kinds of games, and though he also loves people, it’s striving for a win, for success that makes him happy.

    Although there is no single recipe for happiness, just as there is no recipe for depression, there underlies a way to increase what does make us happy, and it’s oh so simple!

    Yes, you guessed correctly, it’s mindfulness!

    It starts with practicing awareness and committing to at least 10-20 minutes a day to center the mind and body, asking how you feel constantly.

    Then with the foundation of awareness, we can identify and jot down those things that bring a true sense of happiness and just do more of those things.

    Oh, and you can chuck out all those self-help happiness guides because what provides a sense of happiness, contentment, and life satisfaction is right in front of us.

    It’s all around us, it’s the small, seemingly insignificant moments when someone is kind to us or gifts a smile, it’s the compliment of our clothing or the touch of a friend. Happiness is here and now.