Slipping this week’s blog post in on the last day of the month, on Halloween. It’s fascinating how we attribute meaning to a certain day, to a random rising and setting of the sun. I think the activities and reasons to get together are great, I just find it odd that it sometimes comes with an expectation to do something (like dress up or eat candy all day).
Mindfulness teaches observation without judgment, just pure curiosity through all our senses. And what I observe is neither right nor wrong either. We are all entitled to our own observations, yet how wonderful our world would be if we stepped back just a little bit more each day.
Hope you enjoy this throwback post on a lesson I learned while backpacking parts of the world. I found, many times, that if I just lower my expectations and assumptions of an experience to as low as possible (having to sleep on the floor of a train on the way to Austria), then I can be nothing but appreciative of each experience, as there is always something to appreciate (the fact I am traveling to Austria!)
“I learned to always take on things I’d never done before. Growth and comfort do not coexist.”
– Ginni Rometty
I used to have a quote on all my social profiles that would say misery accompanies growth, but now I see the error in my thinking.
If it’s true growth, there is no misery, only minor or major discomfort.
I will add this to my daily affirmations. What an accurate and powerful one: growth and comfort do not coexist.
This simple saying is a powerful reminder that stepping out of the situational and mental comfort zones of life can bring a transformation to the mind and body.
Take the attitude of a U.S. Marine, for example, who is told to push the mind to overcome the body and then listen to the body to overcome the fear.
Then take the attitude of a farmer, who knows there is a day of physical toil and labor ahead of them but rises early and intently to meet it.
The Marine becomes comfortable with the uncomfortable by saving lives; the farmer does so by producing a plentiful harvest. Both reap the benefits of that discomfort.
By welcoming the pain rather than dreading it, you can win the psychological battle of discomfort before it even starts. The Marines call this “embracing the suck.”
On a farm, patience and perseverance win that same psychological battle. Farmers know the underrated notion that if we desire anything inside or outside the limits of our current ability, we must be willing to work at getting it.
What falls outside our current abilities? Well, if you’re anything like me, asking for help is harder than I’d like to admit, but it is an essential ingredient in long-term growth.
How can someone fight an army or plant a field by themselves? The vision can be singular, but the work must be done in a multitude.
Now, all of this isn’t to say we should never give up and let go of some things; like the tight grasp on a rope tied to a moving object, burning the hands, and straining the arms.
There is something to be said about giving up and the current view of it. Not only is giving up good, but it is a necessity for sustainable growth.
This brings into doubt a notion in the famous saying: it’s about the journey, not the destination.
But if the journey makes you miserable, then the destination isn’t worth it.
The suck will still suck just as bad, but it will suck because you are aligned with the outcome.
But how do you know what to give up on and what to push through? It takes a nice concoction of mindfulness and experimentation.
Mindfulness to strengthen the mind-body experience and experimentation to give the gut some options.
This process is like driving a car through all kinds of tough environments. When we are deeply tuned in to what the body is saying while we grow in any endeavor, we know where to turn left, right, or even turn around completely.
Every time I travel, I feel this sense of comfort and growth battling it out in my mind. It’s not always easy choosing to grow, but boy, is it rewarding.
Through having to change plans on a dime, find work when I’m running out of funds, or learn a language to build relationships, backpacking was for me a sort of catalyst for growth.
Another example is cold showers. They are uncomfortable, sure, but they push my comfort zone lower and lower each time, to the point that now I really enjoy a cold shower!
I encourage you to do just one thing that you find uncomfortable. It could be trying a new food, talking to a complete stranger, or going cold at the end of your shower.
In the beginning, keep pushing yourself, because that discomfort is your growth!
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