Mindfulness &

how to be aware in an unaware world

Tag: encouragement

  • Obstacles

    Obstacles

    “Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal.” – Henry Ford

    While pondering my future, as I frequently do, I asked myself the ever-evolving and hard-to-answer question, “What is my dream?”

    This question came to mind when listening to an old podcast on Spotify called Wake Up / Wind Down.

    The host, Niall Breslin, with his deep Irish accent and mellow voice, sprinkles bits of wisdom twice a day, after waking up and before winding down.

    You can imagine that soft voice during a daily wind-down:

    “Use the senses to deepen your meditation: the smells, the sounds, the feeling of the muscles relaxing and settling in the body.”

    “Allow the mind and body to rest. To prepare for a new day tomorrow.”

    Taking on a project to not just have a twice-daily meditation practice, but to publish it to the world is incredible. The amount of obstacles you must move past to keep it up!

    I have mad respect for Niall, to make not one but two episodes a day, three minutes for the wake-up and nine minutes for the wind-down.

    In his own words, it was his way of keeping himself accountable to a daily meditation and reflection practice.

    Distraction, depression, worry, and anxiety were his obstacles to realizing his dream.

    Having kept his ambitious goal for over two years, recording most of the short episodes from his bedroom, Niall worked towards his goal of owning his own recording studio.

    And now he does, recording all kinds of projects and continuing his podcast journey with the Where’s the Mind Podcast.

    Personally, I have held an eight-year morning meditation practice, and occasional evening one, often tuning into the Wind Down episodes to settle into a good night’s rest.

    My obstacles were pretty much the same: restlessness, tiredness, contemplation, and rumination.

    I discovered one night during meditation, right before midnight, that the many obstacles, both in and out of the mind, had not stopped me from achieving my goal that day.

    I had discovered a thing that was so captivating, so helpful, that I had wanted to return to it no matter what.

    I later tried to apply different habit-forming techniques to other things, like recording a podcast each day, but never kept it going. It did not captivate me enough.

    We must desire to identify with a habit or else it won’t become one.

    After years of work, I can identify now as a meditator, an athlete, and a writer because I meditate, work out, and write each day.

    Those obstacles were no different than a storyline, created in my mind and fueled by more thinking, pulling me away from my dream.

    So, searching within for my dream, I found a place that kept beckoning me to return.

    A place that is filled with wonder, awe, and inspiration.

    A place that, between pages bound by glue and heat, changed the way I saw the world.

    A place that I found possible to create ever since I was given a journal by a mentor of mine years ago.

    That mentor said, “Take these blank pages and fill them with your very soul”.

    My dream then was to become a writer, to express myself in one of the oldest mediums in the world: words.

    My dream has not changed but evolved, knowing that making something natural, like writing, takes immense time and energy.

    Looking back, there have been many obstacles to this goal, and there still are many today, but I am continually realizing this dream with every word I write.

    Listening to Niall realize his dream of becoming a podcaster simply by recording his voice assured me that the hard work would pay off “one day”, or I should say it would feel like “one day”.

    In reality, what cultivates over days, weeks, months, and years is what creates a “day” that you get a book published, a record made, or a chiseled body. A “day” that you realize you’ve made it.

    And on that day, the real work begins.

    On that day, the obstacles are a lot less frightful.

  • Criticism

    Criticism

    I’ve changed the structure and format of these posts to be more engaging and precise about what the post is about, hope you’ll enjoy this one! If you do find value in my musings, you can Buy Me a Coffee over at buymeacoffee.com/mindfulnessand Thank you in advance!

    “If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear.”
    – George Orwell

    This is such a potent quote today, where we are very divided in this country and that division has created callousness towards differing opinions. Orwell is so right to say that the price of liberty is freedom of not only speech but also attention.

    True attention holds no reserve judgment or criticism, it involves listening without the two, and even without a response.

    I believe Orwell is also not saying that liberty means we should reserve our truest thoughts and opinions for those who will listen either but rather mindfully express those two openly and kindly.

    If we were to only speak what comforts the ears of others, and only listen to what comforts our own, we would live in a fantasy, a utopia that is far from reality.

    The reality is, that everyone has an opinion, some much more fixed to theirs than others, and instead of avoiding those that we don’t sit well with or fighting back at them, we can have an open mind and just listen. How to Handle Receiving Constructive Criticism

    There are small, subtle, impactful ways we can listen to criticism, and in a way, strengthen a mental muscle akin to willpower (the strength to just shut up and listen).

    1. Remember there’s a benefit to receiving criticism:
      What benefits you might be asking? Well, criticism helps us improve our listening skills, patience, and relationships as well as helping us find any truth in what the other person is saying.
    2. Curtail any reaction you’re having to the criticism:
      We are reactionary creatures it’s true, which is why this takes a good bit of mindfulness. Although it can be challenging to receive criticism from a co-worker, friend, family member, or even someone that you don’t fully respect, just remember that the most accurate and constructive feedback often comes from ‘flawed’ sources.
    3. There is a deep understanding of listening to criticism:
      When receiving feedback, cultivate a mindful presence. Engage in active listening, providing a space for the individual to express their thoughts fully and uninterrupted. Once they’ve shared, reflect on their words to them, seeking clarity, such as, “It sounds like you’re suggesting I use a kinder tone, is that accurate?” Refrain from analyzing or challenging their assessment; instead, center your focus on comprehending their viewpoint. Extend understanding by giving the benefit of the doubt, and acknowledging the challenge of delivering feedback. Please recognize that the person offering feedback may feel uneasy or might not articulate their thoughts perfectly.

    If this were the mode of operation and standard of thought for that which causes division in the world today, there would be little to no division at all.

    Yeah, sometimes what other people have to say sucks and sometimes it’s uncomfortable, but their opinion can open your eyes and face things you might otherwise ignore. How to Handle Criticism Like a Pro

    The right to speak openly and even critically is fundamental, no matter how unpleasant it sounds to the status quo. Without this ability, we have no liberty. Have a wonderful day yall!

  • Reason

    Reason

    “Our civilization is still in a middle stage, scarcely beast, in that it is no longer wholly guided by instinct; scarcely human, in that it is not yet wholly guided by reason.”
    – Theodore Dreiser

    Instinct and reason both help advance the human species. However much of our evolution has relied on instinct as the primary driver for survival, we now rely on reason to propel us.

    Instinct is defined as an inborn pattern of behavior characteristic of a species and often a response to specific environmental stimuli.

    Reason, on the other hand, is the capacity to apply logic consciously by concluding new or existing information, to seek the truth. It is associated with such characteristically human activities as philosophy, science, language, mathematics, and art, and is normally considered a distinguishing ability humans possess.

    Reflection

    We are hard-wired to use both as a means of survival and evolution. There is a popular movement going on right now that concerns me, the movement away from reason, to act solely on impulse and instinct when guided by emotion and sensation.

    Because of this, I believe there is a greater need to practice mindfulness than ever before. Mindfulness is characterized by an awareness of oneself in isolation and with the world around them.

    If we reach a point where we use reason as a deduction and primary method of decision-making, we will inevitably make smarter, more mindful choices.

    This is a point reached with mindfulness practice, deep contemplation, and deliberate action.

    Such catalysts are meditation, gratitude, manifestation, deep conversation, open-minded thinking, and Tai Chi).

    One thing recently revealed to me that I started for the new year is Gratitude Manifestation.

    I’ll write a whole post on it soon, but basically, you express gratitude, on paper and out loud, for things and situations you want as if you already have them in your life.

    One of them for me is saying, “I am thankful for a place of my own, near the mountains, filled with plants and artifacts from around the world, good people, and tall, wide windows allowing sunlight to stream in like a river flowing”.

    I may not have this place yet in reality, but it’s clear and concise there in my mind whenever I look and recite it, and that holds the power to get it!

    Also, the more descriptive and imaginative the manifestations are the better. Just make sure they’re realistic enough to achieve too (a nice-sized apartment vs a 6-bed mansion).

    Instinct ought to be reserved as a survival mechanism for ourselves and others (like when we or someone else is in real danger and we can do something about it).

    This property of our mind, the human mind, has allowed us to evolve into such safe living today, without fear of a lion eating us or the cold freezing us. Our instinct is our safeguard and we do need to tend to it too.

    Such activities include camping, cold therapy like ice baths, heat therapy like saunas, strenuous exercise, and extreme sports.

    Instinct and Reason balance on a scale as close as life and death do, both necessary for the nourishment of life.

    This is a scale we must balance acutely though. We are more connected to the world than ever before and yet more disconnected from the person down the street.

    Instinct tells us to stay away and take care of ourselves, but reason says to connect and include that person in our life.

    Encouragement

    I encourage us to ask: “What does this balance look like in my life?”

    “Am I more guided by more feeling or thinking?” “Do I tend to act impulsive or mindfully? 

    This is no easy task, it takes practice to be reasonable, but the beauty is that it is obtainable! Keep meditating ya’ll!

    Thanks

    Thanks for reading these long, stream-of-consciousness posts ya’ll, your feedback keeps me writing them!

    As always, feel free to share, print, comment below, or tell a friend. You can always support me too at buymeacoffee.com/mindfulnessand

    Links

    1. Theodore Dreiser | American Naturalist Novelist & Journalist
    2. The Instinct Definition: What It Is & the Science Behind It
    3. 9 Habits to Be a More Responsible Person
    4. How Gratitude Rewires Your Brain | Jim Kwik