Mindfulness &

how to be aware in an unaware world

Tag: reflection

  • Criticism

    Criticism

    I’ve changed the structure and format of these posts to be more engaging and precise about what the post is about, hope you’ll enjoy this one! If you do find value in my musings, you can Buy Me a Coffee over at buymeacoffee.com/mindfulnessand Thank you in advance!

    “If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear.”
    – George Orwell

    This is such a potent quote today, where we are very divided in this country and that division has created callousness towards differing opinions. Orwell is so right to say that the price of liberty is freedom of not only speech but also attention.

    True attention holds no reserve judgment or criticism, it involves listening without the two, and even without a response.

    I believe Orwell is also not saying that liberty means we should reserve our truest thoughts and opinions for those who will listen either but rather mindfully express those two openly and kindly.

    If we were to only speak what comforts the ears of others, and only listen to what comforts our own, we would live in a fantasy, a utopia that is far from reality.

    The reality is, that everyone has an opinion, some much more fixed to theirs than others, and instead of avoiding those that we don’t sit well with or fighting back at them, we can have an open mind and just listen. How to Handle Receiving Constructive Criticism

    There are small, subtle, impactful ways we can listen to criticism, and in a way, strengthen a mental muscle akin to willpower (the strength to just shut up and listen).

    1. Remember there’s a benefit to receiving criticism:
      What benefits you might be asking? Well, criticism helps us improve our listening skills, patience, and relationships as well as helping us find any truth in what the other person is saying.
    2. Curtail any reaction you’re having to the criticism:
      We are reactionary creatures it’s true, which is why this takes a good bit of mindfulness. Although it can be challenging to receive criticism from a co-worker, friend, family member, or even someone that you don’t fully respect, just remember that the most accurate and constructive feedback often comes from ‘flawed’ sources.
    3. There is a deep understanding of listening to criticism:
      When receiving feedback, cultivate a mindful presence. Engage in active listening, providing a space for the individual to express their thoughts fully and uninterrupted. Once they’ve shared, reflect on their words to them, seeking clarity, such as, “It sounds like you’re suggesting I use a kinder tone, is that accurate?” Refrain from analyzing or challenging their assessment; instead, center your focus on comprehending their viewpoint. Extend understanding by giving the benefit of the doubt, and acknowledging the challenge of delivering feedback. Please recognize that the person offering feedback may feel uneasy or might not articulate their thoughts perfectly.

    If this were the mode of operation and standard of thought for that which causes division in the world today, there would be little to no division at all.

    Yeah, sometimes what other people have to say sucks and sometimes it’s uncomfortable, but their opinion can open your eyes and face things you might otherwise ignore. How to Handle Criticism Like a Pro

    The right to speak openly and even critically is fundamental, no matter how unpleasant it sounds to the status quo. Without this ability, we have no liberty. Have a wonderful day yall!

  • Less

    Less

    I’ve been working on these Gratitude Manifestations, one of which was the gratitude for a job I greatly enjoy and challenges me, and well, it has come to fruition and filled my plate with a ton of work. I have now found the pace to get back into writing, and will continue to do so each day! If you enjoy my posts and would like to, you can support me over at buymeacoffee.com/mindfulnessand

    “The best things in life aren’t things.“

    This one isn’t so much a quote as it is a simple yet profound statement passed on for thousands of years. For the past few months I have begun to repeat this phrase in my day, and by way of repetition, also understand its meaning more and more.

    The Best Things in Life Aren’t Things

    I have found, over and over, that the purpose of life, at least as mine is concerned, includes people. The relationships and experiences spent with the ones I love, admire, and get to know, have strengthened this revelation.

    Additionally, living with less has taught me to appreciate more. More time, more energy, more ideas, more travel, and more opportunities.

    It’s when I break down the idea of possession that I find this truth: I don’t own a single thing (the posture of Stoicism).

    Stoicism: You Don’t Own Anything.

    Yes, you hear that right.  Everything I had, have, and will ever have is borrowed. My car and everything in it is borrowed from resources of the Earth, from the air I breathe to the body I inhabit is borrowed for a few years and then returned to the Earth.

    The Philosophy of Stoicism

    We are but animated shells on this ride called life, and it’s this realization that helps me put it all in perspective and feel so grateful for these gifts. For this shared, human experience.

    But why then do we hold ever so tightly onto the things (tangible and intangible) as if they will remain in our lives forever?

    Because of a little unknown word called enculturation, which teaches us to desire and strive for the things and people we want so we can experience and “have” them for ourselves.

    We are indoctrinated at a young age to think and act with enculturation, and it takes constant practice and mindfulness as an adult not to give in to it, and even then we still do.

    This isn’t to say things don’t matter. Every post on this blog, this post, was typed on a laptop that I enjoy using, from a company that makes consumer goods I’m particularly attached to (I’ll let you guess which one).

    But I remind myself often that these are things for my usage alone, and therefore, I shouldn’t get particularly attached to them.

    Should I be robbed or lose these things, life will go on (quite literally). If we don’t remember to use things for their proper purposes, they can, over time, rob of us the truth that the best things in life aren’t things, but rather the people and experiences we have throughout our lives.

    So, you probably asking by now, Josh, what are the damn 6 ways to live with less?

    1. Take on the minimalism game – So every time I mention this challenge, people freak out and already give up. It’s not necessarily a challenge to become a minimalist, but rather minimize the clutter in your life! Just try it for a week at least!
    2. Keep a box or bag in your room or common area to put things in that no longer serve a purpose in your life.
    3. Go through your phone’s apps, photos, videos, and documents; deleting the things that you forgot were buried in there.
    4. Also go through your computer’s apps, photos, videos, and documents; and save the things you want or need to the cloud.
    5. This might sound counter-intuitive, but turn your phone (and computer) screens to monochrome, which will make your devices boring as shit, and you will be far less fixated on the stuff on them.
    6. When we stare at screens much less than we stare at our friend’s faces, we begin to live with less, less of all that is advertised on our screens!

    Consider today those closest to you. Spend time with them if you can, or just call them up and thank them for being in your life.

  • Reason

    Reason

    “Our civilization is still in a middle stage, scarcely beast, in that it is no longer wholly guided by instinct; scarcely human, in that it is not yet wholly guided by reason.”
    – Theodore Dreiser

    Instinct and reason both help advance the human species. However much of our evolution has relied on instinct as the primary driver for survival, we now rely on reason to propel us.

    Instinct is defined as an inborn pattern of behavior characteristic of a species and often a response to specific environmental stimuli.

    Reason, on the other hand, is the capacity to apply logic consciously by concluding new or existing information, to seek the truth. It is associated with such characteristically human activities as philosophy, science, language, mathematics, and art, and is normally considered a distinguishing ability humans possess.

    Reflection

    We are hard-wired to use both as a means of survival and evolution. There is a popular movement going on right now that concerns me, the movement away from reason, to act solely on impulse and instinct when guided by emotion and sensation.

    Because of this, I believe there is a greater need to practice mindfulness than ever before. Mindfulness is characterized by an awareness of oneself in isolation and with the world around them.

    If we reach a point where we use reason as a deduction and primary method of decision-making, we will inevitably make smarter, more mindful choices.

    This is a point reached with mindfulness practice, deep contemplation, and deliberate action.

    Such catalysts are meditation, gratitude, manifestation, deep conversation, open-minded thinking, and Tai Chi).

    One thing recently revealed to me that I started for the new year is Gratitude Manifestation.

    I’ll write a whole post on it soon, but basically, you express gratitude, on paper and out loud, for things and situations you want as if you already have them in your life.

    One of them for me is saying, “I am thankful for a place of my own, near the mountains, filled with plants and artifacts from around the world, good people, and tall, wide windows allowing sunlight to stream in like a river flowing”.

    I may not have this place yet in reality, but it’s clear and concise there in my mind whenever I look and recite it, and that holds the power to get it!

    Also, the more descriptive and imaginative the manifestations are the better. Just make sure they’re realistic enough to achieve too (a nice-sized apartment vs a 6-bed mansion).

    Instinct ought to be reserved as a survival mechanism for ourselves and others (like when we or someone else is in real danger and we can do something about it).

    This property of our mind, the human mind, has allowed us to evolve into such safe living today, without fear of a lion eating us or the cold freezing us. Our instinct is our safeguard and we do need to tend to it too.

    Such activities include camping, cold therapy like ice baths, heat therapy like saunas, strenuous exercise, and extreme sports.

    Instinct and Reason balance on a scale as close as life and death do, both necessary for the nourishment of life.

    This is a scale we must balance acutely though. We are more connected to the world than ever before and yet more disconnected from the person down the street.

    Instinct tells us to stay away and take care of ourselves, but reason says to connect and include that person in our life.

    Encouragement

    I encourage us to ask: “What does this balance look like in my life?”

    “Am I more guided by more feeling or thinking?” “Do I tend to act impulsive or mindfully? 

    This is no easy task, it takes practice to be reasonable, but the beauty is that it is obtainable! Keep meditating ya’ll!

    Thanks

    Thanks for reading these long, stream-of-consciousness posts ya’ll, your feedback keeps me writing them!

    As always, feel free to share, print, comment below, or tell a friend. You can always support me too at buymeacoffee.com/mindfulnessand

    Links

    1. Theodore Dreiser | American Naturalist Novelist & Journalist
    2. The Instinct Definition: What It Is & the Science Behind It
    3. 9 Habits to Be a More Responsible Person
    4. How Gratitude Rewires Your Brain | Jim Kwik